The Bride: What if happily ever after doesn’t happen?

Let us rejoice and be glad

and give him glory!

For the wedding of the Lamb has come,

and his bride has made herself ready.

—Revelation 19:7

As soon as I opened my eyes and realized the date, my mind traveled back 35 years to my wedding day, the start of what I dreamed would be a beautiful family life. I recalled a poem I wrote that described the reality:

One sunny morning on the fifth of May

A young maid hurries to prepare for her day

She borrows her mother’s gown, aged an off-white,

And the gown fits perfectly to the bride’s delight!

With a delicate veil, she covers her face.

Eyes full of hope shine through soft lace.

Her heart races as she slips into shoes that are new.

She completes the old adage with a garter of blue.

A bouquet of pink roses she holds in her hand

While her attendants of three around her stand.

She takes that step that will change her life

As she walks down the aisle to become his wife.

A decade later on a sunny May morn

The bride wears a gown that is tattered and worn.

Three little children are her attendants this day.

Her bouquet has faded, and the groom is away.

Tears fill her eyes as she recalls that day

When she borrowed a gown on the fifth of May.

After many years, the heartache is old, nothing is new,

He has forgotten again, and the bride is blue.

Shortly after the poem was penned, my marriage ended, as so many others do.

 

She borrows her mother's gown, aged an off-white,
And the gown fits perfectly to the bride's delight!

Even though the years have passed and the wound has healed, thinking about my failed marriage that morning brought a twinge of regret and sorrow to the surface. But I pushed back that twinge as I lifted my head, arose from my bed and parted the pink rose-printed curtains. I peered out the window to gaze upon the day. The rain I had heard in the darkness had ended, leaving the landscape fresh and clean, the dust of yesterday washed away. My eyes fell upon the rosebush below and I gasped at the newly formed bud, its leaves green and laden with fat drops of nourishment.

I thought about how God makes all things new (Revelation 21:5), how He heals the brokenhearted (Psalm 147:3) and works all things together for good (Romans 8:28).

Divorce is ugly and not what God desires for us, but He loves us through it all. He forgives, He strengthens, and He transforms. He is the God of fresh starts. His mercies are new every morning (Lamentations 3:23).

I quickly snapped a photo of the beauty and hurried to prepare for my day. Soon I found myself walking down the church aisle to find a place. I slipped into a row; my friends slipped in beside me. We greeted each other with a warm embrace, then lifted our voices in song. The lyrics on the screen (Ever Be by Bethel Music Publishing) seemed to be tailored just for me:

Your love is devoted like a ring of solid gold

Like a vow that is tested like a covenant of old

And Your love is enduring through the winter rain

And beyond the horizon with mercy for today

Faithful You have been and faithful you will be

You pledge yourself to me and it's why I sing

The vows that were spoken 35 years earlier were broken; the gold rings were stashed in a box. But His love never fails; it endures through it all, till the end of time and beyond (Psalm 136:1-2).

We continued to sing:

Now you're making me like you

Clothing me in white

Bringing beauty from ashes

For You will have Your bride

Free of all her guilt and rid of all her shame

And known by her true name and it's why I sing

Tears filled my eyes as I made the connection. I am His bride. He has cleansed me and clothed me in white (Isaiah 1:18). He has forgiven and healed. In my mind, I penned a new verse to my poem:

“I’m not finished with you yet,” I was told.

And His vow has been tested like a covenant of old.

Now I see! Behold, He makes everything new!

He never forgets, He’s always true blue.

I lifted my hands, my heart echoing the words of my mouth:

And it's why I sing

Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips

Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips

Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips

Your praise will ever be on my lips, ever be on my lips

Dear Jesus, my devoted Bridegroom, thank You for the beautiful ways You love me, like orchestrating worship service lyrics to speak Your love tones directly to me. You know me inside and out and perceive my thoughts from afar (Psalm 139:1-2). You know what’s on my heart and bless me like only You can. You have been forever faithful throughout the years, lifting me from the ashes of despair and cleansing me from the dust of yesterday. You have healed my heartache and freed me from guilt and shame. Now I am known by my true name, Your bride. And that’s what I will ever be and that’s why I will ever sing. Happily ever after.

P.S. Dear Ones, if you too have experienced divorce, loss, pain, or grief of any kind or are currently enduring a trial, know that you are loved. Know that He is ever-present. And He’s not done with you yet. He has a purpose for your pain and will not waste the hurt. While you endure, He is testing the genuineness of your faith, of greater worth than gold (1 Peter 1:6-7). Weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning (Psalm 30:5b). He will turn your grief to joy (John 16:20), turn your mourning into dancing (Psalm 30:11), and give you a beautiful headdress instead of ashes (Isaiah 61:3). Even now He’s working out all the details of your happily ever after.

Bethel Music Publishing. Lyrics to “Ever Be.” Retrieved from Google on May 11, 2019.

P.P.S. Many songs speak powerful messages. Here are a couple I just discovered. Maybe they will inspire you too.

God's Not Done With You by Tauren Wells

I'll Be Okay by Lydia Laird